A Faithful Few to Freedom. [Tarot & Oracle Pull]

Good evening friends. I know it has been a couple of days. I’ve been trying to gather my personal energy to be able to come across and share for myself, but also be vulnerable enough to express my shortcomings and how potentially we as a collective can move towards these steps to benefit from sharing a life of freedom in all aspects.

Now, I will give you my ‘gangsta gurry’ pull on what freedom is. Freedom, to me, has already directly related to the societal norms that have been placed upon you, and how you feel like you’re able to maneuver though all these situations. This has not been the easiest because or day to day lives somewhat hinder us from finding that true essence of freedom that we might be trying to attain. I know personally for myself, there are things that I do on a daily basis after starting back this school year that has not aligned towards what I have always seen myself being able to do. Parts of the reason why I haven’t taken the leap into my true destiny is out of fear, but hope toward what I can consistently learn as the days go by.

I know for me, the idea of freedom is complex. It’s been broken down by the dictionary such as, “the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance of restraint’. This leads me into the question of asking you – have you uncovered your personal freedom and what that looks like?

I ask this because a lot of the times, we as humans don’t take a step back to really think about what best serves is in the long run. Yes, we all make mistakes. Yes, we may not always be our best selves, but what are those triggering factors that hinder us from getting to our primary goal. That’s half the battle. I think that freedom comes from the idea of standing your own ground, and know where energetically you belong around, and what spaces you choose to be a part of.

Since starting work back, I have been feeling so many anxious spells because I feel so out of place when it comes to making decision. I think that half of the battle, also, is the fear of how we will be received from taking that leap. A lot of that desire for freedom and free will is something instilled in everyone’s soul, but the actual call to action hinders people to live to their greatest potential. As we are nearing the Full Moon tomorrow, coming to terms about whatever in your life that doesn’t serve you and the spaces you want to infiltrate are a sign of you maturing and seeking your personal freedom and not letting anyone take that from you. This is NOT easier said than done, because we as adults and young adults feel as though we have to fit a certain mold in order to have that freedom. That all starts with you however, and setting boundaries for self in regards to what you want in your space and what you don’t. Your freedom for life comes from you making decisions that may be uncomfortable in your primary situation, but you standing our ground and owning what you need to fight on is your only saving grace. Most of us have not been doing the ground work to the extent necessary in order to gain that idea of freedom, and have been shy all our lives and don’t know how to say ‘no’. If you have faith that the path you are currently traversing doesn’t serve you, why continue to put forth effort towards something that cannot serve you in the long term. You have been giving a soul mission and you have been given the opportunity to be great- and you just have to remember that it’s always not perfect, it can be messy, but everything can fall into place if you allow it to.

My journey with freedom has been ups and downs, but I also have learned that there are things I won’t stand for as they stunt my personal growth. And I know what energy I should take in and keep on the backburner. Today, I want you all to focus on the idea of freedom, and how that would look like for you.

Some personal examples: not teaching/working with young adults that don’t understand the severity of their actions. I also find like I can’t find power in my day to day because it feels disjointed and with the additional theme of trying to give what I can to my prior gifts has been harder than ever before. I can’t blame the for happening the way that they did but I know what doesn’t serve me.

This was the first week of being back to school and I felt so out of place. I’m not teaching (period) and I mean, my free time sitting in trainings is great and all but it doesn’t fulfill my soul the way I need it to. It makes me take a step back and writing throughout this blog is one of those things that I know I need to do in order to find my personal, unadulterrated freedom. In order to figure out what freedom is, here’s a quote I got from Kyle Gray.

“Today you are encouraged to express your feelings and experiences with grace. If there’s something that you’ve been holding back from saying, now is the time to free yourself. When you share your feelings, you create space within yourself for miracles to enter. When you free yourself of a feeling, you give yourself love. When you express your feelings, you perform an act of self-love. When you honor your feelings, you hold the special place to be honored If you are unsure on how to say something to the world, just say you’re unsure of yourself. That’s okay. This is a way to dive into what feelings and freedom you are able to acquire. Have an honest conversation with yourself – let out how you truly feel. Once you have reached that deep state of honesty, hand over the reins to the Universe and allow it to lead the way. This is some step in gaining your freedom back again. No one will coddle you. No one will lift you up if they don’t feel like they can come to you and share what is necessary. Thank the Universe for supporting and surrounding you with life. You can hand the situation entirely over to you.

I say this to say – I’m still adjusting to my new role and it’s been a bitch, and coming back from Survivor and then thrown into a pool of new people, with the most extra ass trainings has been a lot and I am lacking this idea of having true freedom. I have high hopes but I’m still mad analytical and I feel like my experience would be such a great asset anywhere. Half of it is just me  owning what’s going on, sticking out as long as I can, ad then going from there. The other half makes me wanna become a tyrant and I left that life a while ago. Recognize your true feelings, and it will help you feel so good to be honest with yourself for once.

I don’t know where that would lead me to career wise or side hustle wise, but I do what I do when I an. And that’s half the battle. Expressing your emotions is an act of self love and will help you move towards your own personal freedoms. You are unique, you are one, and you will make all this come to pass. Watch.

I want you to focus on what your own personal freedom is, and start making strides and giving a big middle finger to those that don’t get it or understand your point of view on everything. Those that don’t and can’t support you emotionally and physically the way you need to are toxic in your life. Bear this in mind. Your path will illuminate itself – it’s all about you trusting that it’ll be okay no matter what.

Now, I’m going to try and do an Oracle Card pulling from my new deck written by John Holland, and then go into the Tarot Card Pull of the day before the night is over. The New Full moon is tomorrow and it will help you recognize you come out on the other side stronger and more aware for what your true calling and purpose is. You just have to let the signs of the Universe allow you to see what’s good, and you will go from there.

You have the power to create your own version of success if you block the bullshit out and go from there. Trust.




The Oracle Card I pulled for myself today was the idea of Power. The 8 at the top has to deal with the Major Arcana and the number 8 is such a number. The number 8 in dice divination is related to power, authority, strength, organization, control, and materialism. This makes me believe that you are on the path of owning your own power and running with that. As a spiritual being, you have so much power at your command. It represents all of the above listed, plus generosity, compassion, and love. In the card, we see a red background (vitality, strength, passion, temper, hard work, survival, temper, and leadership and red is used with the base chakra. You also see on the card that an older man transforms into a lion, and that’s so dope because to me, your power lies dormant inside you. You have to be the one to unlock it and let it live. Resolve issues in your life. The strength we refer to is emotional, physical, emotional, and everything that just fits the bill for a life of living in your purpose and taking a leap. This is what will help you to find your own personal freedom in a world full of hellacious things around you. Power and strength work in harmony in any situation, and it’s the opportunity to stop, body check, and ask about what are you supposed to be learning about a lesson in front of you and make the situation better. This brings you to your freedom of self. Ask yourself the question – what makes you feel that duality and also with wake up calls in your life need fine tuning so you’re in the best place ever. I just pass that wisdom on in order to for you to live in power in your daily life.


The Tarot Pull for the day is the Babalorisha inverted. He is the card of the Priest, whose hand is risen to the sky to ask for mercy and enlightenment, showing respect and waving to the Orishas, and whose other hand carries a bell in order to call on the Saints for help.

You can’t do this work towards personal freedom without having the proper grounding. Erase what doesn’t serve you in any capacity and hinders you from getting to that level of power and freedom. You have it inside you to go forth and prosper. You have the ability to erase noxious old points of view and function in the space you want if you choose to. He is high spirituality, and the more you connect to your spiritual soul, the more he is going to be able to guide you on your path to freedom. He can control the four elements of nature through force or power, and you have to reclaim your time and reclaim your power. You may not have been doing that in the sense that it makes the best sense for you, but you know what needs to be accomplished in your own life to recalibrate because the natural portions of Earth want to guide you down that path. This is conferred to by his guardian angels, and I want to you to remember that these angels surround you in all moments of the day and time if you choose to focus your energy that way. It is inverted because you have a lack of self-assurance and faith in oneself. Your materialism is prevailing, and being solely materially based doesn’t help you gain the freedom you’re looking for – you need to re-evaulate what does not serve your highest purpose and highest power in any way, and try to prevent this from happening.

Your protection is weak and impulsiveness and incoherence will lead you down a wrong path. If you have been feeling an uneasiness about something, your gut and your spirit is trying to forewarn you to get it all together and you will find that growth and freedom in your own regards. I know that I have personally been struggling with what my next step is, and honestly just feeling out of body. I spent my whole day today like…I needed a step back from people. And I needed that to recharge me to even write this today, as with my new job and all of the other things I want accomplished have not allowed me the space in order to focus on what I need to for my own happiness and my own growth. The card represents an individual who plays an important role in society, and someone who is a relevant, powerful minded, but troubled person. This links to you just not functioning into what the Orishas and your Ancestors see for you. You need to recalibrate in time for this Full Moon later today, which will help you to embrace the journey and know that it is going to serve you to your highest potential through the realm of trust. When you can rely on self, freedom comes to pass. And we all want to experience our own personal freedoms. Everyone isn’t chosen to do this, but if you feel like you can be chosen, put in the work to find your freedom and your end goal towards what will forever serve you. Don’t let your ego or selfishness get in the way, and you should be fine. …the human ego may feel moved to experience divine attributes, but only at the cost of exceeding itself and falling into disaster.

You don’t want your life to fall into disaster. Take some time to really dig through your life and figure out what doesn’t help you get to the next level as far as you being happy and adapting that idea of what freedom is. It isn’t going to make anyone else happy except for you, especially if you’re rocking in the sense that it all will be okay. I have to remind myself daily of this.

I have a gift and it’s meant to be shared. Maybe not in the capacity it is now, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t recenter myself (my theme of the week) and search for that balance. You guys got this shit if you believe that your freedom is the most important part of life growth and maturity. When you can do that, you have succeeded.

Take some time before this Full Moon to think about what journeys you want to see for yourself coming forward to manifest, and focus solely on you. As an empath, I’m so concerned for others but right now, you gotta focus on you and what is going to help serve you in the best way possible. Don’t be selfish. Don’t let your ego in the way. Follow your heart, and your freedom will eventually land you where to be. We don’t do scary hoes, so just hop into it and make it happen. You have the power and the strength on your side. Don’t forget that at all.

I hope this spoke to you, and you continue searching for your light in the sunrise, making sure that you are focusing on your own personal power.

You got this. I believe in myself and I believe in you.

Amen. Asé.


P.S. If you haven’t seen my most recent appearance on my friend Hector D’s page in regards to open relationships, give it a look and tell me what you think. Here is the link for that and you all should feel free to always tweet me (gangstaGURRY) or hit me on IG (__sobredosis) in order to share your thoughts.

I send you all into the new week focusing on your freedom. Write it out. You are supported, even through the ups and downs. Just remember that you are the author of this along with your spiritual guides and the Angels surrounding you. The Ancestors never want to see you fail, so continue to fight.

Also, if you want a tarot card reading from a friend that posts daily, visit this page that responds to the Leo Full Moon and how you should be focusing your energy, and if you would like a new reading from me, comment on my Contact page and I got you.

I have a Twitter follower named Ismadid Seylin (@sideeyespecial) that focuses on the Leo New Moon and there’s a thread he pulled in regards to where you should be focusing your energy. It spoke to me.

Tarot Pull – 8.13.18 – VI (6) of Air Inverted

Happy Monday guys. Today has been somewhat of one of those Mondays here in New York – rainy, and just a nuisance to have to deal with cloudy weather. I’m the type of person/empath where my emotions and the weather match, and today is a perfect example of what that means. It’s just been really ugly all day long, and that’s never fun.

Did y’all watch Insecure last night? I know I did. I have my thoughts about what this season is going to give, such as Molly setting her boundaries with Dro (COME ON UNIVERSE BEING ALIGNED WITH ISSA RAE AND ALL THE WRITERS IN REGARDS TO MY POSTS COMING TO LIFE) and Issa just trying to get her head on straight when it comes to her whole life. It seems like everyone in the show is in a state of becoming, and so are we. We are becoming even truer versions of ourselves, and fighting to remember what is most important to us and our spiritual growth, as well as our mental health. Hell, even people on television are proving to us that it’s important for us to remember what our boundaries are, and who the hell we actually are.

Today, before I lead into the Tarot Card pull of the day, I want to give you all this mantra I came across this week. Weekly, I read the tarot cards for the energy that you should be channeling from the week from one of my favorite websites, Forever Conscious, and the mantra at the very end of the page spoke to me.

“I see my past as my friend, leading me towards a positive future. I let go of any negative thought patterns. I am always moving forward.”

This was something I needed to read. Yesterday, I felt extremely guilty for not writing, but I just didn’t have the energy or the time, honestly. My mind has been in flux lately with so many things going on – work starting next week, me being out of town this weekend and being disconnected from the world, writing letters of recommendation for college, helping a friend edit his book…the list goes on. Normally, all of these things lead me to feel frantic and overwhelmed. I hate having a to-do list and feeling like there’s not enough time for me to get everything done, but also find that balance between productivity and running myself ragged. I simply beat myself up for sleeping in too late today (lemme tell you, sleeping in front of the A/C all night will fuck you up the next morning), but I knew that my body needed the rest. I was sad I didn’t post yesterday, but knew that creatively, my mind needed a break. I worked on some personal stuff instead, and I remembered that there’s no need for me to go into this anxiety driven state, like I normally do. Sometimes, all I need to do is take a breath, connect with my soul star and my Earth star, and just remember that I am not perfect. Whatever can get done will get done. I urge you to take care of yourself and your process this week, and learn from how you have felt in the past and whether or not it served you. I mean, today, I got in the gym (and y’all know how I just groaned and moaned about being in the gym a couple posts ago). I knew that it was a priority and a promise I made to myself, and I wanted to stick to it because I knew it would help me in the long run. While I was exhausted afterwards (and still am), I’m glad I didn’t succumb to the idea of just saying ‘no’ and finding a way to talk myself out of it. I faced my truth, and knew that my ideas of the gym were a lie. It can be a haven of peace and release if I allow it to be. That’s a choice I consciously have to make, and I am moving forward and releasing negative thought patterns around it.

If there’s something in your life today that you have had negative experiences with in the past, they offer lessons to us. If the lesson is you staying away from that space, honor that. If you have a negative thought pattern around it that is unjustified, take some time to look inside yourself and figure out why you feel the way that you feel. Perhaps it can clarify some things for you, and allow you to do the inner work necessary to prevail and remind yourself of why you can make a choice to change the way you react to things for the better.

Now, today’s card is the 6 of Air inverted.


As ya’ll can see, there are a bunch of birds flying around a beach, with the sun in the background, looking peaceful.

“Six birds on the seashore fly away. They may be trying to reach other lands, or they may just be flying around, playing in the air. In the air, they feel like queens of the sky, endowed as they are with the gift of flying and the ability to spend the night on any shore where they find suitable weather.”

I interpret this in general to mean that wherever you are, you have a choice – you either can move around and do different things, experience different emotions, and go through different circumstances if you choose. You can also just chill, be majestic, and know that the gifts that you are blessed with allow you to be where you want to be when you want to be there. It also talks about them ‘playing in the air’. Sometimes, you can choose to move around with purpose. Sometimes, you just want to be free. Channel that energy if you choose.

However, the inversion of this card has a different meaning. It states: ‘dispersion, distraction, disquiet. Immobility, putting down roots, settling down. That which does not mutate.’

A couple of things that arise from within me – you may be feeling like there are so many distractions happening in your life right now. I know I have been. Take a second to figure out why you’re distracted if you are, get to the root of it, and determine whether or not said distraction is worth that energy. You may be led to spread some of your love, some of that energy that has you distracted, or whatever has you stagnant to other areas of your life. Don’t feel like you can’t move or you’re ‘immobile’. That is a choice if you allow it to be. Life is made to be lived as free, and you (me) personally may feel like you’re trapped. You aren’t though. You have the choice to do what the hell you want, and just be as free as a bird is, flying all throughout the skies. You can still put roots down somewhere, but you are still able to love and experience life for what it is worth if that’s your choice. You are a queen/king, after all. Everything in your head may not be quiet either. That’s okay too – figure out how to silence your mind. I suggest meditation, because when you have the opportunity to look inward, you’re able to try and tap into the root of some of your problems. This could be very beneficial for you in many ways.

You may be feeling a bit stagnant right now, or a bit frazzled. That’s okay. Just remember that you have a choice to not feel that way, and you know what it takes in order for you to feel much more at peace and move forward to a place of serenity. You could put down roots and that helps you settle down. That could alleviate some of the noise in your brain. You could also distract yourself with something positive for you. These are all suggestions to help you lead a healthier, better life.

Take some time to think about yourself, and give yourself a little love for what you have accomplished today. Envision what all parts of life look like for you, and whether you choose to be free as a bird and play, or fly south for the winter. It’s really a daily choice in regards to what you choose to feel. You’re in control of that, and you can experience all of those emotions. You just need to determine what’s best for you in the grand scheme of things, and how you truly want to feel.

Be present in where you are right now, and where you’re going. You’ll see things manifest for you if you focus your intentions and energy where you visualize yourself being as I’ve stated before. You don’t have to live in that disquiet at all unless you choose to. Everything is your own personal choice. Choose what’s best for you.

Press on, my friends. You’re doing great.

Amen. Asé.