burning books. [SOLITUDE + ACE OF FIRE]

Good Rising, readers. This Supermoon has been something else, ey? I know that ever since we’ve had this Supermoon pass, the energy has felt like a rollercoaster a bit. Personally, sleeping has been somewhat of an issue. I’ve been feeling a lot more energy than normal. It’s also feeling like I’m in a space where ideas are finally starting to take form, but now it’s going to come with a lot of effort being put in on my end. As I wrote yesterday in my post, it feels like there is a mountain that is up ahead that is able to be seen, and it’s just waiting on the right person to tackle it at the right time.

Today, I was reading something and came across the topic of being willing to receive, while giving generously. This connects back to karmic law, as far as ‘what is given shall be received’, and I think at times, we forget this. I know as an empath, my primary purpose is to always give and receiving is such a weird space for me to be in. Getting gifts, being surprised, small little acts of kindness…I’m grateful for most definitely, but they’re not my first instinct. Naturally, as a giver, I tend to lean into that side of myself first but have learned the more that I grow up that giving TOO MUCH comes with terrible consequences. There are so many energy suckers out here, so be wary of who you spend your time with and who you give your energy to. Lean in with love today, and make sure that recognize you are deserving of whatever support, love and help you need along the way. Make sure that you find that balance between the two, and continue to push forward with that mentality as our days go on by. Also, be willing to receive the goodness of happiness from others. If people are truly giving from their heart, you’ll know. It could be the smallest of gestures, but that’s a way of showing love.

With so much shit happening in the world, small acts of kindness are the potion that could potentially bring us together or tear us apart. Every small act of politeness and kindness doesn’t always come with some instantaneous reward, but that shouldn’t be the focus. It should be more about the feeling you get when you’re able to support someone else the way they should. Your time will come when it’s your moment to receive.

Today, while pulling, I pulled the Major Arcana Oracle Card Solitude and the Ace of Fire from my Tarot of the Orisha deck. (let me tell you – random sidenote; if this is what my days could consist of on a regular basis? Lord Jesus, heavenly Ancestors and Spirit hear my cry…this would be great.)

As I ease into my morning, these are the two cards that somewhat go with the energy I’m feeling. It’s this mixture of wanting to be alone and gather thoughts, ideas, and figure some things out in life (trying to decide whether or not this is at home or just around the city because I’m off)…but also feeling like a lion because I want to roam around a bit without doing too much. Y’all know lions leisurely stroll and I would love to be able to hit a teleport button right now and be in the middle of a park somewhere in the city really quickly, get a little air, and teleport back home. A bitch can dream, can’t she? Who buying me a teleportation watch?

Anyways, as we see in the Solitude card, baby girl is wearing a blue dress and she is reading what seems to be a book. The color blue is connected with the throat chakra and has to do with communication, expression, imagination, and freedom. The other interesting thing about this is that the book is positioned so that way, it feels as though she’s allowing us to read along with her at the same time. I’m feeling like this is telling us to take some time to re-read our situations in life and sit with them for some time. Look at the ink you’ve left behind on the pages. Go back and revisit them. Give yourself some time to look inside your soul and figure out what’s going on. The setting also shows that in the background, it looks like we are around the time of sunset and there is a huge pillar in the background standing erect behind the young woman. The pillar to me looks like the rook from the game of Chess, and we all know that the rook can move wherever it wants on the board in certain directions as far as it wants at any time. The background makes me feel as though if you’re reading this at any point during the day, take some time to step back and let yourself reflect upon your soul and what it is asking for more of. You’ve been moving all over the place lately with your thoughts and have so many paths you can take and it is currently time to take inventory of what is going on and which direction you want to move. What I’m feeling is that you need to take a knee and listen to your soul in a quiet, beautiful sacred place for you at some point today. It carries all the answers to what you’re looking for.

People love alone time, but underestimate the power of alone time that serves as rejuvenation in a variety of ways. Meditation, writing, vegging out to help decompress, working on a passion project…all these things are valid and good ways to make use of your quiet time. As a society, everyone wants to go out and do things more often than not and socialize with friends which is fine, but don’t spend enough time convening with themselves. This card is telling you to make sure that you schedule time to reinvigorate your spirit and conserve your energy properly. Take things as they come. Don’t rush the time that you need to check in with your soul and make sure you all are on one accord. Make this an intentional part of your day from now on so it becomes a habitual practice. I know personally, I’ll throw on some binaural beats or isochronic tones and just breathe to catch myself up back with myself for the moment. Take some time to give yourself space today from everyone, unplug from them, and charge yourself back up.

With Miss Ace of Fire, it’s going to make you want to feel like the center of attention on this day. Miss Lion is PERCHT in the jungle, and as we see in the background, it’s a beautiful day. It seems like Miss Lion is just sitting there, letting you admire your beauty but is ready to pounce whenever necessary. You’re probably going to be feeling a bit fiery today, and that’s okay. Combined with this Solitude pull, this would seem a bit confusing correct? In all actuality, what this is telling me is that you are going to be able to find the balance of doing what needs to get done and listening to your soul and giving it space when it is needed. You want to be understood. You want to be flattered. Or you may want to flatter others because they need it. That symbiotic relationship will be imperative towards your growth and emotional state today. Remember that you have the fire of a lion and whatever comes your way, you will move through with ease Take on whatever endeavors you want today and be charismatic about it. Your bubbly personality in the workplace or around others won’t go unnoticed. Also, go within and value yourself for being your most authentic self and letting others affirm you. Even though you don’t need this necessarily, it’s good to get that love not just from yourself, but others. Today could also be a good day for you to get some “good day gooch” and maybe knock boots a bit if things go your way. As long as you put in the effort, everything will fall into place. You have the power of decision. You can decide how you want to engage with others. You can decide how you want to spend your quiet time today, reflecting. You can decide who you want to let be a part of your energetic space. It all comes down to you.

TL;DR: Make sure you spread love as much as you talk about how much you want to receive it, ensure that you give yourself that love first before throwing it all willy-nilly elsewhere and be the star of your show today by letting that sparkling personality shine. You deserve.

Amen. Asé.

-gg

Serenity.

When I first wrote this word as the title of this post, I automatically thought of Sailor Moon. For those of you that don’t know, I’m a huge Sailor Moon fan. She is like the pinnacle of me first knowing I was gay to be quite honest, because I used to run home from school everyday to catch her and all of my girls on TV and get enthralled in their stories. (Just so it’s out there/if you’re a fan of the show, I stan Sailor Venus/Sailor Venus is me). It just amazed me to see them transform from simple school girls into warriors, there to save the Earth from damage and harm. Even though at times they seemed ‘weak’ in the typical eye of what a ‘superhero’ is supposed to be (what the hell was that ‘Mercury Bubbles Blast’?!?!?! Why were they always getting dusted by the Black Moon Clan?? Don’t even get me started on Sailor Stars – Sailor Galaxia jacked all them UP!!!!!), they still represented and fought against all that was wrong in the world, and I can’t say that they haven’t inspired me in some ways to be the person that I am today. A bitch be out here fighting evil by moonlight, and winning love by daylight. #yesimridiculous

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Anyways, Princess Serenity (for all you people who don’t know about/watch Sailor Moon – shame on you, Lindsie) is the prior reincarnation of Sailor Moon in the MoonKingdom, before all hell broke loose in the Moon Kingdom. Serenity (Serena/Usagi in her Earth form) was fascinated by the Earth (I don’t know how she would feel about Earth present day in regards to all the crazy shit that is happening in our world) and decided to travel to Earth against her mother’s wishes and met a man who she fell in love with, Prince Endymion (who is reincarnated as Mamoru/Darien (Japanese/English version). Long story short, some shit goes down in the Moon Kingdom during this time, and Prince Endymion dies saving Princess Serenity. Ridden with grief and guilt, Princess Serenity commits suicide in order to be with her man (I’m assuming this, I’m not sure if this was confirmed for sure because I ain’t read the manga, I just watched the show in its entirety 3000 times but I mean…the love of your life is gone and we have seen people in life die shortly after their loved ones/partners pass on to the afterlife). Her mother, Queen Serenity, then used the Silver Crystal to reincarnate her daughter, her lover, and all of the rest of the Sailor Senshi to have another chance at life on Earth. This was the ultimate sacrifice, as she then lost her own life because she chose to use the Silver (Moon) Crystal and its energy in order for others to have another chance at life. This is how the series begins, if I’m not mistaken. I could be wrong, it’s been a little while since I’ve watched the show, but this is why Serena/Usagi is on Earth and finally develops her powers and finds her tribe once again, and is always protecting that damn crystal in her locket. It’s what gives her life and allows her to be the light for others and take out the darkness in the bad guys.

Now, that has absolutely nothing, but something to do with what I wanted to get out in today’s post and the topic of ‘serenity’. Serenity is defined as “the state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled“. I believe Princess and Queen Serenity received their name because their soul mission was to have peace in the Moon Kingdom, and then on planet Earth. I have been legitimately been searching for serenity for quite some time, and I’m going to tell you that that shit is not easy. It’s a choice to be serene. It’s a choice to be calm. It’s a choice to be peaceful and untroubled. It’s a choice MOMENT to MOMENT to be that way. And I haven’t been failing at it per se, but I have been feeling so many moments as of late that have been ramping my anxiety up, or sending me into overdrive.

I bring this word up and this topic up because of a reading I came across yesterday, and it being reaffirmed in a conversation I had later on in the day. I don’t want to share where the reading comes from, but some people may know/you can Google it if you so choose. Basically, the idea comes from the serenity prayer that we all know:

God [being able to] grant you the serenity to accept the things you cannot change, the courage to change the things you can and the wisdom to know the difference.

As of late, I can’t tell you how many times I have said this prayer, or even heard it. Yesterday, I really had to sit and think about what it means to be ‘serene’. To me, it means that you are calm. You’re unfazed by things, and you choose to be peaceful. I also believe it means that you have the courage to change the things and leave the spaces that don’t make you peaceful and take away your joy. That takes a whole lot of work, and a lot of assessment. The more that I realize I’m working towards this place of  true ‘serenity’, the more I realize that I truly have to manifest the power to just block out what does not serve me, and know the difference between what brings me peace and what doesn’t. We all don’t owe anyone anything when it comes to our version of perfect peace.

The book I read said that serenity seemed like an impossible goal when first seeing/hearing that prayer. I had to take a second to rethink what I thought the word ‘serene’ meant. I’ve always attributed it to just being chill, and not letting things bother you. Isn’t that a state of life that you always want to be in? Don’t you want to just be even keeled and not bothered by things all the time – even the slightest inconveniences? That takes practice, and consistent checking in with yourself in order to be in that state. That’s not always easy, and not always doable because let’s be real – we all have triggers. Whether it’s something as small as someone not remembering your name or who you are after you met them several times and engaged with them (p e t t y), or someone violating your personal space in a way that makes you uncomfortable that brings up past feelings that don’t make you feel good. It moves you out of this place of being calm, and makes you want to turn up real fast. TRUST – I am learning how to change the process of thought I go through of negative self talk, overthinking, and worrying in order to just be ‘serene’ and find that state of calm that I so deeply desire.

Serenity is plain recognition. It’s basically a realistic way of seeing what’s going on in front of us, accompanied with inner peace and strength. It’s like something that stabilizes us and lets us keep our balance no matter what turbulence swirls around us. That is a state of mind that is worth aiming for on a regular basis. Without it, what are we? We tend to be angry. We tend to be worrisome.

What if we just flip the script and start positively affirming things?

I’m worried about getting this job. —> “Yes, I’ll get this job, but if I don’t get it, something else will be out there for me that suits me.”

He really grinds my gears when he talks to me like that because he don’t know me like that. —> “I find it bothersome when people address me in this manner, but I’m not going to choose to latch onto those negative feelings right now, because I’m vibrating higher than that.”

His energy is throwing me off right now and it’s making me feel uncomfortable. –> “You know, it’s getting late and I just need to get home right now because something just made me feel a little off and I just need some space to quiet my mind.”

I’m tired of spending money on bills!!!!! I can’t ever keep any money! —> “I’m grateful and blessed that I have finances to be able to pay what I can, and whatever I can’t pay will get paid when I have the ability to. I can’t stress myself out with what I don’t have, and I still have to live. Worrying about them going to collections isn’t going to stop it right now from happening – I’ll do the best I can when I can and I will be provided with the funds eventually to make this up because I have faith everything will be alright.” (CHYLE, adult life is no joke!)

And a personal one for you I deal with…

My sobriety makes me feel so lonely because the sober people I know, I don’t really mesh with all that well all the time and I can’t be in spaces all the time where drinking and drugs are happening around me, so I feel isolated and like I can’t have fun anymore. —> “I’m grateful that I’m able to wake up tomorrow with a clear mind, and I can always see my friends in a different capacity where that’s not going to serve as a trigger for me and make me feel unhappy or like I’m missing out. I choose this peace and clarity of mind for my own wellness, and that’s okay. I would rather this than cloud myself with things that may cause me regret tomorrow. I’ll just spend my time doing something else.”

Choosing serenity isn’t easy everyday. It really is a daily practice to try and be serene. Your work will get done. You’ll get to see your friends. You will have chances to enjoy life on your own terms. You won’t allow others’ actions to trigger you to a point of no return. You have the power to choose to be peaceful, calm, and evenly centered. You are allowed to have sun in your life daily, even if there isn’t sun outside. Even in depression, which I suffer from, I know that it’s even more difficult for us that battle with that to find the positive in things. It truly is an act of kindness and self-love in order to try and do the best that you can everyday.

It may be messy.

It won’t be perfect.

But giving it a try is better than shrugging it off.

Now, go out there and be like Serenity. Not the killing yourself part, but choosing to allow peace to be your primary concern. I’m working on it myself, and you can too. Take some time to figure out how you can bring serenity into your life more on a daily basis, and practice reframing your thinking towards your benefit. The more you do that, the more you will see the changes manifest themselves, and the happier you have the potential to be.

Amen. Asé.

-gg

Tarot Pull – 8.10.18 – Elebba/Eleguá/Eleggua

Happy Friday, friends, spristas, and family! Today is the day before the New Moon, which is in Leo and it’s a Super New Moon. There is also a partial Solar Eclipse happening, and this all goes down tomorrow early in the morning at 5:57 AM. As a Scorpio, I’m taking my time to rest and just prepare for all of the shit that is about to go down tomorrow to essentially be the final chapter of what we have been experiencing. I’m ready for a restart in so many ways, and know I am in control along with my Higher Power to usher in that energy. Remember, there are legit six planets in retrograde currently (Mars, Saturn, Neptune, Pluto, Mercury, and now Uranus as of this week) so if you have been feeling all over the place emotionally, don’t think that it’s just because of you being crazy. The Universe and the cosmos are literally all over the place right now. If you have been seeing old things/issues come to the surface, and you’ve been trying to start anew or make amends to things, this is the perfect time to make sure that you prepare intentions for this new phase in your life and what you want to see happening. Lessons are wrapping up, and you have the ability to create and manifest what you want to see actually happening in your life, and leave all that other mess at the door.

The New Moon in Leo will truly make you focus on what makes you happy, and allow you to do that final work in reflection on what routines, habits, and actions you need to take in order to function at your personal best. It’s truly a time to let go of the past, and look towards the future, remembering that everything can change at the drop of a dime if you make the efforts to do such with a positive mindset. Remember that post on motivation I had? This is an optimal time to finishing figuring out what doors you want to close, and what roads you want to open towards your path to happiness, success, and your own personal truth. Things will start to become even more clearer to you than ever before, so take heed as to what your intuition is leading you to, and how you feel in any and all situations. Since this is a Super New Moon, it’s gonna be wild, so hold onto your socks!

Today’s tarot pull is SUPER timely, and I find it interesting that it’s what I pulled today because of what is happening around me personally, and happening with the Universe tomorrow. Today, I pulled the card Elebba/Eleggua.

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“Eleggua is the patron of all doors and of all roads. Therefore the magical keys to open the most inviolable locks and the permits to walk the different paths that humanity will travel belong to him.”

In the title, you may notice that I referenced this card many a ways. Dependent upon the background that one may understand the Orishas, Elebba/Eleggua/Eleguá may be spelled differently, but it all means the same thing. He is the one that is the door opener, and the one that opens new paths towards what is designed for you. Most people who practice Santería, Candomblé, or Palo Mayombe believe him to be the “master of force”, and you must have his approval before moving down the path that you seek. He is the protector of villages and cities and towns, and his image is to be placed behind or close to the entrance of the house. If you think about it, your comings in and goings out have to be blessed in order to manifest the dreams and truth that you want.

This morning during my dice divination, I rolled a 3 and a 6. This just shows me that I’m right where the energy needs to be, as I continue pulling info from my companion booklet.

“He is made up of the soil of three or seven crossroads, water from three or seven rivers, rain collected three or seven times during the third or seventh month or in three or seven months of the year…etc.” I think that this three that I rolled shows that he’s present in this reading and telling me and you all that the roads are here to be walked down. I think of some personal doors that I am opening and working on, and how motivated I’ve been feeling for a change or for something new and exciting to be a part of my path. This just soothes my spirit, knowing that everything that is happening right now is coming in divine timing. I also think of what doors I’ve been working on closing lately, and how that has been helping me to be a better person and feel in a much better space.

Have you gotten a new job lately? Have you been feeling a push towards tackling a new venture? Have you been given a job promotion, or found a new passion in doing something? This could be because the energies around you are supporting you in feeling this. Don’t sleep on this energy – go with it, but don’t tire yourself out from it. Be patient with yourself – it’s all coming together.

The meaning of this card is related to jobs, mainly. “There will be progress in one’s work or job. Abundant productivity. Profitable advertising campaign; your message will be well-received. Tempting and practicable offers. Vitality.”

This is super exciting for me to pull and show you all today because it means that there is something coming that is amazing. The work that you have been putting in is coming to pass, and the Universe is going to give you great karma back if you have been giving the best of yourself to it.

Personally, I know that I have been staying motivated with writing here as much as possible, trying to stay on top of other goals that I have (and I also just finished this super awesome goals worksheet from my girlfriend, Destiny, that helped me to focus on getting in the gym and holding myself accountable for it – you should check her current site out and her new site dropping next month!!!). I have also just thinking about how all of what I’m doing and the energy I’m putting out is being received, first for myself, and then in light of what I want to see manifest in my life even further. As an empath, I’m always thinking of others, and I want to continue to be and shed that light for others, so I do this to help you all get closer towards your personal immaculate design.

This is also perfect timing because lots of doors that were open in my life that weren’t healthy for me are closing, and I’m seeing some of the mental emotional changes that I have been having. If you don’t know, I have had a tumultuous relationship with alcohol for the past …probably 10 years, and I’ve been getting the help that I need to make sure that I stay sober. It hasn’t been an easy road, but I’ve been taking the steps to realize that every day is a step towards a healthy life, and I’m working towards building even stronger relationships in my sobriety. I’m grateful for the work I have done and even though every day isn’t perfect, I’m sober and it’s progress, not perfection.

I know that the sacrifices that I am making and the intentions I am setting to lead a healthier, happier, more honest life are going to be momentous for me and others around me, and I send so much loving energy to you all as we transition into these new astrological moments coming forward.

Are you seeing some of your past doors closing? Are you ensuring that you’re doing work to keep them closed, and thanking yourself for working daily towards seeing what you want to see manifest itself? Remember that you are human and that you are not perfect – it’s all a process, and it all will come to pass if you allow it to. All you can do is just do your best on a regular basis in order to welcome that positivity and that energy. Allow yourself to be supported. Be patient.

I’m so ready for tomorrow – it feels like it’ll be the final exam for me before I start to see my new life completely manifesting itself the way I want to see it happening. Today, I plan on doing some vision setting. I would suggest you take some time to do this today or before Sunday. My birthday is a little less than two and a half months away, and I think this is the perfect time to envision what I want to see happening within the last couple of months before I turn 29. If I spend my time focusing my energy towards that today, who knows what will actually happen during that timeframe? You can never get too early a head start on your own spiritual awakening and your own graciousness coming to pass. I feel like the death of an old Gangsta Gurry has happened, and a new G is being reborn again. And I’m fucking with that energy.

I want you to stay hydrated today, stay positive, stay aligned, and be thankful for what you have accomplished thus far. Focus on what you can be grateful for today, and what has changed this year for you for the positive. There are so many little things you can be grateful for, and the more you welcome that energy into your life the more you’ll be able to manifest the life that you want.

Shine on, my friends.

Asé. Amen.

-gg