A Faithful Few to Freedom. [Tarot & Oracle Pull]

Good evening friends. I know it has been a couple of days. I’ve been trying to gather my personal energy to be able to come across and share for myself, but also be vulnerable enough to express my shortcomings and how potentially we as a collective can move towards these steps to benefit from sharing a life of freedom in all aspects.

Now, I will give you my ‘gangsta gurry’ pull on what freedom is. Freedom, to me, has already directly related to the societal norms that have been placed upon you, and how you feel like you’re able to maneuver though all these situations. This has not been the easiest because or day to day lives somewhat hinder us from finding that true essence of freedom that we might be trying to attain. I know personally for myself, there are things that I do on a daily basis after starting back this school year that has not aligned towards what I have always seen myself being able to do. Parts of the reason why I haven’t taken the leap into my true destiny is out of fear, but hope toward what I can consistently learn as the days go by.

I know for me, the idea of freedom is complex. It’s been broken down by the dictionary such as, “the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance of restraint’. This leads me into the question of asking you – have you uncovered your personal freedom and what that looks like?

I ask this because a lot of the times, we as humans don’t take a step back to really think about what best serves is in the long run. Yes, we all make mistakes. Yes, we may not always be our best selves, but what are those triggering factors that hinder us from getting to our primary goal. That’s half the battle. I think that freedom comes from the idea of standing your own ground, and know where energetically you belong around, and what spaces you choose to be a part of.

Since starting work back, I have been feeling so many anxious spells because I feel so out of place when it comes to making decision. I think that half of the battle, also, is the fear of how we will be received from taking that leap. A lot of that desire for freedom and free will is something instilled in everyone’s soul, but the actual call to action hinders people to live to their greatest potential. As we are nearing the Full Moon tomorrow, coming to terms about whatever in your life that doesn’t serve you and the spaces you want to infiltrate are a sign of you maturing and seeking your personal freedom and not letting anyone take that from you. This is NOT easier said than done, because we as adults and young adults feel as though we have to fit a certain mold in order to have that freedom. That all starts with you however, and setting boundaries for self in regards to what you want in your space and what you don’t. Your freedom for life comes from you making decisions that may be uncomfortable in your primary situation, but you standing our ground and owning what you need to fight on is your only saving grace. Most of us have not been doing the ground work to the extent necessary in order to gain that idea of freedom, and have been shy all our lives and don’t know how to say ‘no’. If you have faith that the path you are currently traversing doesn’t serve you, why continue to put forth effort towards something that cannot serve you in the long term. You have been giving a soul mission and you have been given the opportunity to be great- and you just have to remember that it’s always not perfect, it can be messy, but everything can fall into place if you allow it to.

My journey with freedom has been ups and downs, but I also have learned that there are things I won’t stand for as they stunt my personal growth. And I know what energy I should take in and keep on the backburner. Today, I want you all to focus on the idea of freedom, and how that would look like for you.

Some personal examples: not teaching/working with young adults that don’t understand the severity of their actions. I also find like I can’t find power in my day to day because it feels disjointed and with the additional theme of trying to give what I can to my prior gifts has been harder than ever before. I can’t blame the for happening the way that they did but I know what doesn’t serve me.

This was the first week of being back to school and I felt so out of place. I’m not teaching (period) and I mean, my free time sitting in trainings is great and all but it doesn’t fulfill my soul the way I need it to. It makes me take a step back and writing throughout this blog is one of those things that I know I need to do in order to find my personal, unadulterrated freedom. In order to figure out what freedom is, here’s a quote I got from Kyle Gray.

“Today you are encouraged to express your feelings and experiences with grace. If there’s something that you’ve been holding back from saying, now is the time to free yourself. When you share your feelings, you create space within yourself for miracles to enter. When you free yourself of a feeling, you give yourself love. When you express your feelings, you perform an act of self-love. When you honor your feelings, you hold the special place to be honored If you are unsure on how to say something to the world, just say you’re unsure of yourself. That’s okay. This is a way to dive into what feelings and freedom you are able to acquire. Have an honest conversation with yourself – let out how you truly feel. Once you have reached that deep state of honesty, hand over the reins to the Universe and allow it to lead the way. This is some step in gaining your freedom back again. No one will coddle you. No one will lift you up if they don’t feel like they can come to you and share what is necessary. Thank the Universe for supporting and surrounding you with life. You can hand the situation entirely over to you.

I say this to say – I’m still adjusting to my new role and it’s been a bitch, and coming back from Survivor and then thrown into a pool of new people, with the most extra ass trainings has been a lot and I am lacking this idea of having true freedom. I have high hopes but I’m still mad analytical and I feel like my experience would be such a great asset anywhere. Half of it is just me  owning what’s going on, sticking out as long as I can, ad then going from there. The other half makes me wanna become a tyrant and I left that life a while ago. Recognize your true feelings, and it will help you feel so good to be honest with yourself for once.

I don’t know where that would lead me to career wise or side hustle wise, but I do what I do when I an. And that’s half the battle. Expressing your emotions is an act of self love and will help you move towards your own personal freedoms. You are unique, you are one, and you will make all this come to pass. Watch.

I want you to focus on what your own personal freedom is, and start making strides and giving a big middle finger to those that don’t get it or understand your point of view on everything. Those that don’t and can’t support you emotionally and physically the way you need to are toxic in your life. Bear this in mind. Your path will illuminate itself – it’s all about you trusting that it’ll be okay no matter what.

Now, I’m going to try and do an Oracle Card pulling from my new deck written by John Holland, and then go into the Tarot Card Pull of the day before the night is over. The New Full moon is tomorrow and it will help you recognize you come out on the other side stronger and more aware for what your true calling and purpose is. You just have to let the signs of the Universe allow you to see what’s good, and you will go from there.

You have the power to create your own version of success if you block the bullshit out and go from there. Trust.




The Oracle Card I pulled for myself today was the idea of Power. The 8 at the top has to deal with the Major Arcana and the number 8 is such a number. The number 8 in dice divination is related to power, authority, strength, organization, control, and materialism. This makes me believe that you are on the path of owning your own power and running with that. As a spiritual being, you have so much power at your command. It represents all of the above listed, plus generosity, compassion, and love. In the card, we see a red background (vitality, strength, passion, temper, hard work, survival, temper, and leadership and red is used with the base chakra. You also see on the card that an older man transforms into a lion, and that’s so dope because to me, your power lies dormant inside you. You have to be the one to unlock it and let it live. Resolve issues in your life. The strength we refer to is emotional, physical, emotional, and everything that just fits the bill for a life of living in your purpose and taking a leap. This is what will help you to find your own personal freedom in a world full of hellacious things around you. Power and strength work in harmony in any situation, and it’s the opportunity to stop, body check, and ask about what are you supposed to be learning about a lesson in front of you and make the situation better. This brings you to your freedom of self. Ask yourself the question – what makes you feel that duality and also with wake up calls in your life need fine tuning so you’re in the best place ever. I just pass that wisdom on in order to for you to live in power in your daily life.


The Tarot Pull for the day is the Babalorisha inverted. He is the card of the Priest, whose hand is risen to the sky to ask for mercy and enlightenment, showing respect and waving to the Orishas, and whose other hand carries a bell in order to call on the Saints for help.

You can’t do this work towards personal freedom without having the proper grounding. Erase what doesn’t serve you in any capacity and hinders you from getting to that level of power and freedom. You have it inside you to go forth and prosper. You have the ability to erase noxious old points of view and function in the space you want if you choose to. He is high spirituality, and the more you connect to your spiritual soul, the more he is going to be able to guide you on your path to freedom. He can control the four elements of nature through force or power, and you have to reclaim your time and reclaim your power. You may not have been doing that in the sense that it makes the best sense for you, but you know what needs to be accomplished in your own life to recalibrate because the natural portions of Earth want to guide you down that path. This is conferred to by his guardian angels, and I want to you to remember that these angels surround you in all moments of the day and time if you choose to focus your energy that way. It is inverted because you have a lack of self-assurance and faith in oneself. Your materialism is prevailing, and being solely materially based doesn’t help you gain the freedom you’re looking for – you need to re-evaulate what does not serve your highest purpose and highest power in any way, and try to prevent this from happening.

Your protection is weak and impulsiveness and incoherence will lead you down a wrong path. If you have been feeling an uneasiness about something, your gut and your spirit is trying to forewarn you to get it all together and you will find that growth and freedom in your own regards. I know that I have personally been struggling with what my next step is, and honestly just feeling out of body. I spent my whole day today like…I needed a step back from people. And I needed that to recharge me to even write this today, as with my new job and all of the other things I want accomplished have not allowed me the space in order to focus on what I need to for my own happiness and my own growth. The card represents an individual who plays an important role in society, and someone who is a relevant, powerful minded, but troubled person. This links to you just not functioning into what the Orishas and your Ancestors see for you. You need to recalibrate in time for this Full Moon later today, which will help you to embrace the journey and know that it is going to serve you to your highest potential through the realm of trust. When you can rely on self, freedom comes to pass. And we all want to experience our own personal freedoms. Everyone isn’t chosen to do this, but if you feel like you can be chosen, put in the work to find your freedom and your end goal towards what will forever serve you. Don’t let your ego or selfishness get in the way, and you should be fine. …the human ego may feel moved to experience divine attributes, but only at the cost of exceeding itself and falling into disaster.

You don’t want your life to fall into disaster. Take some time to really dig through your life and figure out what doesn’t help you get to the next level as far as you being happy and adapting that idea of what freedom is. It isn’t going to make anyone else happy except for you, especially if you’re rocking in the sense that it all will be okay. I have to remind myself daily of this.

I have a gift and it’s meant to be shared. Maybe not in the capacity it is now, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t recenter myself (my theme of the week) and search for that balance. You guys got this shit if you believe that your freedom is the most important part of life growth and maturity. When you can do that, you have succeeded.

Take some time before this Full Moon to think about what journeys you want to see for yourself coming forward to manifest, and focus solely on you. As an empath, I’m so concerned for others but right now, you gotta focus on you and what is going to help serve you in the best way possible. Don’t be selfish. Don’t let your ego in the way. Follow your heart, and your freedom will eventually land you where to be. We don’t do scary hoes, so just hop into it and make it happen. You have the power and the strength on your side. Don’t forget that at all.

I hope this spoke to you, and you continue searching for your light in the sunrise, making sure that you are focusing on your own personal power.

You got this. I believe in myself and I believe in you.

Amen. Asé.


P.S. If you haven’t seen my most recent appearance on my friend Hector D’s page in regards to open relationships, give it a look and tell me what you think. Here is the link for that and you all should feel free to always tweet me (gangstaGURRY) or hit me on IG (__sobredosis) in order to share your thoughts.

I send you all into the new week focusing on your freedom. Write it out. You are supported, even through the ups and downs. Just remember that you are the author of this along with your spiritual guides and the Angels surrounding you. The Ancestors never want to see you fail, so continue to fight.

Also, if you want a tarot card reading from a friend that posts daily, visit this page that responds to the Leo Full Moon and how you should be focusing your energy, and if you would like a new reading from me, comment on my Contact page and I got you.

I have a Twitter follower named Ismadid Seylin (@sideeyespecial) that focuses on the Leo New Moon and there’s a thread he pulled in regards to where you should be focusing your energy. It spoke to me.

Tarot Pull – 8.11.18 – Salamanders

Happy Super New Moon in Leo and Partial Solar Eclipse, guys! Today has been a day of intuition and circumstance for me, and I’ve spent a lot of it doing things and decluttering my physical space in a way that can make room for something newer and bigger to enter my life. I know a lot of my friends said they spent their day feeling tired or feeling frantic, and if this was you today, know that this is normal. Today is the first day of that energy being let out into the Universe, and it’ll start to ease itself away from you as time goes on. Be focused on the fact that this is the first step into a new you. You have the power to make whatever you want to see happen, and rest is important when it comes to your own personal self-work. You can’t go a mile a minute and not take a moment for self – you also shouldn’t feel guilty about it either. I’ve been learning that day by day, and starting to feel less and less guilty about my insular moments, or when I feel like my emotions are off-kilter. I just go into spaces where I can recenter myself, and feel like the work I’m doing or the spaces I enter are the best for me and where I want my energy to be.

I spent this morning hearing some wonderful stories about the shortcomings people have overcome, and then had some time to visit an old coworker from my very first job in New York. It’s always nice to be able to reconnect with people from your past that will always have a special place in your heart. What was great about this interaction today was that I was gifted with something small I asked the Universe for a while ago. I’d been looking for a new tote bag, because the one that I have is cool, but I wanted something a bit cooler and nicer.

Today, my former coworker, who is really into music and art (that’s how we bonded, plus he is a Scorpio so we got that same kinda energy) has been in the process of getting rid of a lot of things that didn’t serve him. He gifted me with a painting he made of Marion Brown, a jazz artist, and it was something to add to my space. What’s funny is I have been seeing a lot of people post about new artwork they had been buying for their apartment, and I have never been a huge person to have artwork. Well, as of today, I have a new authentic painting of Marion Brown from a friend of mine who actually has a great eye for art, and a brand new tote bag because I had to find a way to carry it home in the rain. He also gifted me with a brand new sweater, and these really cool glasses that he can’t use anymore, but make me look like an even badder bitch.

He’s also a musician, and you can check out his work here – he goes by the stage name Luke Ferrari and he gave me this really awesome pin that I put onto one of my hats. His work is super dope, and takes me back to a really special place that reminds me of the type of music I listened to growing up – a mixture of rock and euphoric music. It was a rainy day here in New York, and getting to vibe out with him was great.

Afterwards, I had come home to figure out where to put the painting. I had to declutter a bit of my space, and I started going through old paperwork and things from past jobs that I knew I didn’t need anymore. It felt like I was seeing old lifestyles and spaces that I used to inhabit coming back out at me, and ripping up those papers and getting rid of them was freeing. It also allowed me to declutter my energetic space, and make more room for the things that are important to me and give my apartment a bit more panache.


Then, I made a spiritual bath for myself (if you want to know more about that, you should submit a question/comment so I can explain to you what that is, and what I did to create it), ate some food, and then showered and doused myself in the spiritual bath. I felt very clean, fresh, and felt like some things that I was ushering out of my life were sealed for good after accomplishing taking that spiritual bath. Now, I’m feeling a bit tired, but relaxed. It’s just what I needed for the end of a rainy Saturday. I’ve got a couple more days before I officially start work back (not ready to enter that realm of turmoil but a bitch has to make coin), and something really exciting to look forward to this upcoming weekend before I go back. I’m grateful for all the positive energy today has brought, and how small manifestations the Universe heard were able to come to fruition without me having to spend a dime.

If you don’t know me, you don’t know that my catch phrase is “If it’s free, it’s for me.” So, anything that’s up my alley that is free is definitely what I enjoy. Also, another subset to that catch phrase is “the closer to free, the better for me”, because wherever I can cut corners to save a buck (especially these days when my money ain’t as long as it used to be), I will.

Anyways, enough about me. Let’s get into the pull for today.

Today’s pull is an elemental card called Salamanders.


Salamanders is an elemental card from the deck that I use. A bit more about elemental cards.

“The elementals represent an evolutionary stage in the angelic scale. They represent the four elements: air, water, fire, and earth. They are the impulses that enliven the idea or conception that nothing is inert, static or motionless, but that, on the contrary, the work of God is latent in everything. The theory was conceived that there is a governing force in one of the each elements. These forces, called “elementals” were modeled according to human ideas, and they were included in artistic creations. They were present in dreams and hopes. They formed countless literary works and films, not all of them for children.”

As we see, elementals represent evolution. As today is a day where we are evolving from one stage to the next, the final stage, closing doors and opening new ones and allowing them to come to fruition, The final stage makes me think of that final boss on Sonic the Hedgehog 2 on Sega that was always hard as shit to beat as a chid for me. But, eventually, after trying many a times, I was able to succeed. I see this tarot pull as one that signifies the beginning of something new in life. As you can see on the card, the Salamanders are all represented by fire in some sense.

“In the Fire, the salamanders live, representing strength, the earth’s internal fire, the first spark that lights everything, directing this energy from the center of the earth towards the surface. They also direct the energy from the sun toward our planet, taking away shadows and darkness, which, in turn, are supported by the apprehensions and fears created by the typical insecurity of the human being.”

This word fear makes me think of a post from another friend of mine, Spirit, who has a YouTube page where she recently discussed fear the difference between rational fear and irrational fear. If you would like to understand the difference between the two and think about ways you can move past some of your irrational fears, you should give that video and her channel a look here.

I want you to sit and think about the fire in your belly that you have towards something. Is there something that’s getting in the way of you manifesting your best life? What is that, and why are you scared of moving forward? What blockages do you need to erase in order to allow that fire to come to the surface? Is there someone or something that’s got you trippin’, and you need a reset in order to come to your senses? Ponder on this right now, because the energy is telling me that it is your time to shine, but you have to tap deep down into yourself and let your insecurities melt away. Ain’t no reason for you to not be brave, bitch.

The text states, “These animals govern physiological functions, collaborating in the process of digestion and body temperature. They provide drive and courage, as well as bravery and justice. This card may represent a man or a woman in his or her forties or with much experience in life, who fights for ideals and who is a great thinker, strategist, army officer, or ruler. His or her will is strong, and he or she is dynamic and optimistic, as well as real and rational.”

We all have the ability to tap into this Universal wisdom that resides inside of us, but many of us are scared to take the leap. When was the last time you were worried to do something because of how it might come across to others? When was the last time that you allowed your lack of bravery and your lack of showing up for yourself to get in the way? There is no reason for you to let fear be your barometer. I heard this quote today and I think it’s great here – do you think there is a limousine with FEAR plastered pulls up to your house everyday, and it is your job to hop inside?

I hope you answered ‘hell the fuck no’. It’s your job to push past your worries, and remember that every opportunity and action is a lesson to push you forward. You have the earth supporting you, the Universe supporting you, but you have to remember that support comes from self first. You have strong will, and you may have needed that reminder today. Take the time now to claim your personal power, and remember that there ain’t no reason for you to not be courageous and be brave in taking on your endeavors. As long as you fight for what is idealistic for you and it doesn’t harm others, how can you lose? As long as you’re rational and think things through without being worried about every little piece, you will be fine.

I think this is perfect in terms of the energy the Universe is trying to serve us today. Remember that now is the time to pop the hell out. You deserve to. Your season is here. I want you to revel in it, and remember that your birthright is happiness, and your fire should never die. When it dies, you lose yourself, and that’s not what will help you get to the next level that you deserve to see yourself at.

Take some time to reconnect to that fire in your belly. It’s there – I can feel it from here. Use all that’s within you in order to push forward and burn the competition and those hater bitches that are in your way. And normally, those hater bitches are your inside voices telling you ‘no’. Tell them to shut the hell up, eat their food and mind their business.

I hope you guys go into the rest of the weekend in power, and remember – you can’t fail if you never try.

Amen. Asé.